For millennials: 21

 

Journaling

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There is no warmth in waiting for the right time. The patience will sting harder than the truth you believe about holding on.

Misery becomes more appealing.

“may you be defined by your boldness in running through dry and dark cracks.”

I’d get into the bus sometimes, most times with my headphones banging loud music out its tiny speakers.

Sitting by windows is my favourite thing. My eyes get to count coloured and grey houses, watch trees and many other greens. I often begin to play rhythmic music in a lowered volume to feel the same feeling I get when watching good scenery movies. I deviate into solitude and just observe.

It is powerful.

The only regular thought I’ve known is home, it’s sometimes with me and other times I fear to think of its broken tone.

I’ve watched myself grow with strangers that I call friends. I’ve been shaken by subtle disagreements imposed by the universe in openness.

I seldom believe we are all here, just making history and not living well enough. We will all die surviving with or without purpose.

“In love, the purest of our souls’ manifest.

In love, we succumb to humility and fear without coercion.

In love, we tell our stories in ways we wish they existed.”

Can you read the signs through my saggy eye bags?

I’m knackered by pressure from my wants and the wants I’m expected to want.

I heard mum’s voice on WhatsApp call and she sounded like 50 hasn’t been good to her. I’ve been thinking of her in a sweet way lately. In a way I would spoil her with happier days if she were here.

“Be generous and kind with what you bear to instil

I’m one and a half page of an A4 gone and I’m still wasting words on consciousness. This is what it feels like to fight forces that you never chose, fighting constantly.

You will live, you will live

You will write, you will write

You will love, you will love

You will break, you will break

You will heal, you will heal

You will die again and again before you learn to live to die.

“Be offended by your zeal to live because thinking of your death will remind you of here always”

 

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2017.

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5 Courtesies I learnt from the Brits

This is my third year in the United Kingdom but I still do not know the names of the cereals Brits consume on a daily basis. Not like it’s important but it once was when not knowing them embarrassed me at work. I literally left a lady with a pack of cereal unopened and without milk, thinking it was a biscuit. I was totally embarrassed when I was cautioned about it, as the lady in question was really old and knew less about the breakfasts that were served to her.

Anyways, I would be giving you 5 courtesies I admire about British people which is not so common to the place and people I belong to.

Watercolor Uk Flag, Watercolor British Flag Art Print

Picture gotten from-Watercolor

“Yes please”-Unlike now, I’d say to anyone behind the counter wherever I shop ” I’d like a bag” if asked “would you like a bag?”. It’s been 3 years, I’m still trying to get a hang on saying ” yes please” right after I’m asked what I want. Yes! I used the word “still trying to get a hang on” as I seldom forget. It takes me approximately 30 seconds to add “please”  just after saying “yes” which probably says a lot about me to the sales person ( she’s an anti-Brit) lol.

Queuing in turns– 17 years of my life was spent in Aba, Abia state, Nigeria and the least you should ever expect from people living there is order. We hustle for anything and everything including space, lol, as it is a business-minded city, but more like a ghetto. You can imagine going from grass to grace, I found it fascinating to find people who even unknowingly queue up. Although, it took a while to get used to the word “queue” talk more of standing in one, I find it easy to reciprocate when a typical Brit paves way for one. Here in the UK, people are well- mannered when it comes to waiting for a bus, waiting at the bank counter or even in a supermarket. It’s something admirable.

“Smiling back”– “Onye kele sunny, sunny ekele ya”, a proverb in my native dialect (Igbo) which depicts the reciprocation of a greeting when greeted. An elderly person regardless of their relation to you expects you to at least greet them with an “Aunty or uncle or sir” or even some sort of title attached, whenever you see them in Nigeria.That to some extent shows respect and good upbringing to them. However, here in the UK, most people quietly give you a broad smile, which is either plain 🙂 or with their teeth all out :D.

Nigerian Flag Art Print

Picture gotten from- Allposters

Visiting Friends– You don’t bugger off to someone’s place in the name of being friends without informing them of your coming. It’s more like intruding someone’s privacy or even disregarding it in some way. I have a childhood friend that lives in the next street back home and whenever it used to be their turn to have light ( NEPA: former power supply in Nigeria) supplied to them, I would always run to her place and she never complained about my uninvited visits. Back then in our area, electricity supply used to be in turns as there were less transformers to step down the main current. Whenever I had light supplied, she never did and vice versa. I’ve now gotten so used to calling or texting before even going to see a neighbor here in the UK.

“Cheers”– It took me probably less than a month to get used to this one :). I found it fancy and less stressful than saying “thank you”. The Brits mostly say it to either show appreciation or just before having a drink and also after toasting to something.  I call it a Brit courtesy because I heard and learnt how to use it here first. I’m not 100% sure of the originators but I like the word.

Although, there are loads of courtesies to adapt from British people, I find these 5 more admirable. I believe if they travel to any country in  Africa and not just Nigeria, they would also have a lot to learn from and adapt to too. What’s the essence of life if not growth? and what waters growth are the little things we learn and do.

Are there any courtesies you found fascinated by as a foreigner in countries you’ve been to? I would love to hear about them. Cheers! 🙂

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2016.

Obese: Poem of mayhem

external image obese-child-in-india.jpg                                                                       Picture gotten fromFuzzyScience

Every image, Every print

a reflection of itself yet not so unreal

the passer-by’s give me a name

scales fail to tell them the truth

I’m not the one who caused the excess

neither do my presence suffocate yours

Unfair, unfair when I look at you and then me

or when you look at me and still stare

My wobbling shadows are now scarecrows

grown ups call me fat, they underestimate what’s beneath

they pry in my strengths and feed on my weaknesses

skinny and average fools!

They forget that life isn’t always where life is,

I exist so they don’t go extinct

I am only a bigger reflection of how they are meant to be

They forget me so much that I lose some of me bit by bit.

But none of that changes what I look forward to

I still cherish my favourite biscuits and chocolates

My every lazy days, dragging my feet and snoring out loud at night

Days I giggle to every tickle

places I forget that I’m obese

Moments I see order in my every said disorder.  .

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2015.

Relationship CV

Here is a profile of someone desperately looking for love in wrong and right places.

Picture from WeHeartIt

RESUME

I wouldn’t claim that I’m living a wonderful life but the life I’ve lived has been a good one. People have experienced me, my good and bad but still left me with sores and void spaces. Giving up on my search is not part of who I am. In short, changing my image to fit a particular person that seems to me like they love me is part of my mission. I am a devoted, faithful, sweet, romantic, hardworking and cheerful person you would always love to be with. I don’t mind if you cheat on me cause I know most men are prone to that, I don’t even mind if you beat me up, my parents raised me up like that, so I see it as discipline. All I want is your constant love, assurance and not waking up one day to put me behind. I believe I can make a good wife and eventually raise kids for you but all I’m asking is for you to accept my plea and be my man/woman.

CV

The new generation man/woman (2000and..)

78 Netflix and chill avenue, Zombie ZF7 0PQ

016894327555

KEY SKILLS

Managerial Experience

  • Being an office worker since my teenage life has equipped me with basic personal skills that makes me a good manager.
  • Speaking with tons of people on daily basis has improved both my communication skills and my courtesy too.
  • Can deal with pressure from people and settle difficult issues regarding company’s problems or even personal problems of co-workers
  • My social life has improved over the past few years by frequently setting nights out, parties, date nights or  a mere social gathering with companies that partner and do business with where I work
  • My sense of humour is admired by every client and co-worker.

Personal Experience

  • Am too much of myself so I constantly look for a complement.
  • I have a phobia when I think of myself at 50 years of age alone and weary.
  • I love long hugs, watching movies and cuddling with the opposite sex.
  • I can totally fit in with anyone and everyone because I’m  always on the look for someone.
  • Living for self is boring and complicated so I tend to live for people

HISTORY

From mother’s womb-14yrs – Naïve and ignorant

15-20yrs– Series of unserious dates and self exploration

21-25yrs– Serious relationships and getting dumped

26yrs-Present– Desperately searching

EDUCATION

I wouldn’t want to mention this to avoid scaring some people away. I’m open to all and I just want you to know that I’m a smart and successful man/woman.

POSITION OF RESPONSIBILITY

  • Nearly became a baby mama/baby father
  • Relationship adviser
  • Side chick/man
  • Main chick/man
  • Open and casual relationship
  • Friends with benefits

INTERESTS

Love skiing and flying kites, Travelling

REFEREES/REFERENCE

Available when we are in a relationship

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DISCLAIMER:This is not everyone’s way of life and certainly not how everyone approach relationships. I advice you take nothing written above personal cause I’m only putting down my own thoughts and opinion on how many people nowadays tend to give away their beautiful selves in the name of searching for love. This is not to bash people or what they believe in, it’s only my own point of view.

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When you desperately look for love in certain places, this is likely the signal you put off to people to show them that love is all you want. We forget the need to fall first for ourselves, we forget that people would only fall in love with us when they see that person who is in content with themselves. This post is not to put people away from loving someone but to remind us that love is free, love is for everyone and everyone someday would get to see through another with all manner of love and not coercion.

Do share your thoughts on this subject in the reply box below. Thank you

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2015.