Struggling out of a 2:2 this final year: my Biomedical Science tale

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I barely bore you with events of my university life on here but I know once in a while I drop one or two major ones. Going back to 2015, my first year, I had blogged about my resits (What if? #17), how awful it felt to had seen my name amongst those resitting Genetics and Statistics. How sad and unlucky my summer was. What I didn’t include was calling my parents and letting them know about the situation. The disappointment in their tone as they spoke to me whilst trying to be good parents and not make me feel worse about the whole situation, the after effect of the whole conversation moved me. I guess my attitude towards everything relating to university and my course became more questionable as days, months and years went by.

Second year was heavy. As my course is a three-year course here in the UK, more pressure was mounted on me and more effort was equally demanded with the load that came with the 12 modules I had done last year. The hustle to secure a placement made it even worse but that wasn’t an excuse not to scale through. At the end of the year, I was awoken yet again by another resit which until today I have managed to  hide from my parents as I felt they would be bitter and really angry towards me if I had told them. Genetics again! At some point in time I joked about it to my friends, telling them how I’m “KINGING” in genetics resit zone. What felt terrible isn’t the fact that I had a resit, what made me break down most nights was the fact that 2:2 ends up being my portion even when I always seem to start off very well at the beginning of each semester. At some point, I just stopped asking why and accepted that university wasn’t for me. Thoughts of dropping out kicked in every now and then but the friends in my circle kept me grounded. They said my prayers with me, cried with me and most of all, they contributed to my healing and strength which led me into pursuing my final year.

It’s the 25th of February today, 22 weeks into final year and there is still no salvaging to my results so far. It hasn’t been stable and at the same time it hasn’t been the most brilliant. One half of my project and most of my course works released so far have been fluctuating with 2:1’s and 2:2’s. My first semester results came out and this time Genetics crossed the cut off point with only 7 marks and I’m most grateful to God for that miracle! the other paper sat comfortably on a 2:1 which to me is gracious. Hard-work and resilience have been with me since the school year started and to be honest with you,  it is a struggle trying to move up from a 2:2. I am 3 weeks into second semester  with 3 more course works, 4 more exams and my main project to finish. I am still with hope and so should you who is reading this thinking you’re sitting in the worst position or situation in life.

If everyone was equal, there wouldn’t be no school, no competition whatsoever and definitely no evolution but other people’s success shouldn’t stall us from ours or blind us from attaining  unmeasurable success instead it should push us.

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I did tweet this last week but it doesn’t mean I can’t do better. In fact it is not an excuse! It is the reason why I’m pushing to move on from a 2:2, proving to myself that even if it’s not for me, it is definitely not impossible!

I hope you find a grip too and go on from there dear reader. Do leave your thoughts and comments in the box below. Thank you.

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2017.

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Securing an undergraduate placement in the UK: my horror story.

I had long doubted my patience until the day I decided to get a gap year from university, working anywhere associated with what I’m currently studying. It’s been over 5 months since my final year started and over 8 since I got rejected by the organization I placed my last hope on. Part of the rejections I got made me embrace this final lap and part has been chaotic and has eventually pushed me to share this. I believe that there are quite a few or many students who would want to know this stage I didn’t quite conquer.

Firstly, I’m an international student and not to say that interviewers or most organizations or bodies that accept placement students discriminate against international students but let’s be real here. Any country whatsoever would consider taking theirs first before any other unless you are exceptionally suitable/ there isn’t any domestic student available to take that role, then you might just be lucky. Anyway, I had that in mind long before I even started cooking up a CV. Second year resumed September 2015 and my university already started putting up advertisements for the roles linked with Biomedical science, which is what I’m currently studying. It is a broad course involving various health and life sectors, therefore adverts were placed on student central (a learning and assessment medium for most universities in England) nearly everyday.

Some of the successful interviews I had gotten were partly due to the help my university (the University of Brighton) had  rendered. They helped get my CV to look more presentable and appropriate, they constantly sent direct emails to me whenever a new position came up, they always replied to most emails I sent and was always willing to give me advice whenever I needed help. That’s really what they can offer anyway, they can’t hand you a place!, don’t know about other universities but I’m speaking of mine.

Fast forward to when the application war began, bear in mind that 1st semester had  already started and I had 6 modules to cover, each with their coursework and examination so you can imagine keeping up with the stress. Most colleagues of mine weren’t interested, so it was a lot harder to share my pain or have them relate with me on something they were not interested in. I applied to quite a few number of pharmaceutical companies including GSK, Pfizer, Nestle and many more. Some would have you submit your application online, which usually takes a long time and after which you also need to do an online test or even several tests before you get an interview which is not even guaranteed. Pheew! GSK, I remember vividly, doing everything until it got to the online test, after a week or so, I got a nicely written rejection. I did apply also to organizations that supported health science and governmental bodies too, all to no avail. Some won’t even bother to leave you with a rejection, you’ll just be waiting for your saviour to come.  To be honest with you, until today, I can’t tell where my perseverance came from. I kept going with all the piles of rejection. It was really saddening.

After my first semester ended, I was able to convince two of my close friends to get a placement year, sharing with them the benefits and long term joy it would leave them. Thankfully, I had them with me for the rest of the application journey. We were told around April 2016 by our placement team that the NHS affiliated hospital (Royal County Sussex) here in Brighton would be putting up various positions, so we should create a totally different CV that complies to the roles that would be advertised, including in it our choices (ie the roles you wish to work in. For eg. haematology, histology etc). We were more than excited because it is commutable and their acceptance rate from our university is high from statistical indications and also not a lot of us were running for the positions.

This was my final hope so I wrote my CV more than three times, had it checked by different well read people and the placement team too and waited patiently for the D day. My friends did too. It was a few weeks before the exam, the advert came up on student central, I applied and waited. We three had gotten an email saying we got ourselves an interview. I was overly joyed and happier that it was the same day for the three of us. One week before my second semester examination, we had gone for the interview and we all came out smiling and hoping. I began to imagine myself even working there and all, you know how your hormones mess you up, yes! it did to me.

It took nearly a month before we got our feedbacks, my friends had called me with excitement that they had been accepted and they would be resuming soon, screaming that I should check my email, that they should have given me a place too. As I opened my email and read the first line, I just closed the whole link and started weeping. I literally weeped out loud. I felt stupid for having persevered the whole time and placing all that effort I should have focused on my studies on placement places I ended up not getting. I questioned what really interviewers wanted, lies? Till today I can’t really say.

Truth is, some people apply the first time and just get it and others are never lucky. I feel like the criteria for getting a place not just a placement place but for most jobs are not always considered and looked into. Most interviewees who end up not getting a place especially suitable candidates don’t always see fairness in recruitments. I believe a new system of accepting employees should be put in place and also placement applications shouldn’t feel like hell for students. More universities should have affiliates where they can  directly place students that choose to do one. I understand international students (me and the rest of them) here in the UK should know better when we signed up to come here to study that there are limited jobs and opportunities considering the population and how small in comparison the country is , but efforts should be made at least to have us secure affiliate places here or abroad with the fees we pay. Home students too.

This is my horror story.

Are there any questions you want to ask regarding this? Or thoughts you wish to share, let me know in the comment box below or email me using the contact form. Thank you.

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2017.

Blogging series 6: Never have I ever

by Dyna Ekwueme

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Picture gotten from-Runningaway

WRITTEN FOR THE THINGS AND PEOPLE I LUSTED FOR

Being vulnerable about my fantasies and sexual cravings for certain kinds of profane words and touch that emits all kinds of vibrations in my writing. Never have I ever been found writing about my wants for  someone else, someone who doesn’t want me, someone who probably thinks I don’t exist. The hypnosis of my feelings, like a spree cursed by a god.

WRITTEN FOR THE THINGS I GAINED FROM PAIN 

The writer’s block I get every now and then, fleeing from my blog like I’m all about that busy life. I wouldn’t write about the long piles of unpublished posts in my draft which has me thinking “I’m not good enough for me”. The resits people don’t see but praise me for as a university girl. The pain and struggle behind it all tends to be hidden in what appears to be like “she’s doing okay” to you.

WRITTEN FOR THE PEOPLE WHO NEED THIS WRITING

With self-obsessive writing blinding me, I fail to write for those who need their voices projected, for those who look up to words to heal them, for those who are not educated and need their tears sent to the government, parliament, leaders, charity organizations and philanthropic bodies through my writing. Never have I ever written enough for change, for love for others, for unity, for development and for substance of evolution.

Part 2 contributed by Emediong Etetim

WRITTEN FOR THE LIFE I WISH I HAD
Everyone feels they understand the level of pain or frustration I’m in. To them, only my feet is touching the water. To me, only my head is above the water. Never have my words been understood but rather misconstrued. Now to live a life where it is okay to not have to explain myself at every turn is all I crave to have.

Disclaimer: This piece was originally written by me and part contributed by Emediong Etetim. No one else had contributed to this piece. 

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2016.

 

 

Blogging series 6: Public appraisal

by Emediong Etetim

In the world where your life is being judged by your online content, where you do not have an interesting day if it isn’t posted on snapchat or your style sense isn’t on par if you do not have a crisp photo on Instagram showing off your latest designer purchase. It is not very surprising that self validation is also being set by twitter’s standards.

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Picture gotten from-Pixabay

In the world where trends are to be followed in order to stay relevant, where everyone’s mind is now programmed to think alike, to act alike, if you do not know the latest music releases, the latest celebrity couples and their cats, the most recent dance moves, or you’re not sporting the pointiest eyeliner, then “girl you tripping”. And you’d sit and wonder whatever happened to ‘uniqueness’.

The words ‘different’, ‘special’, ‘unique’ are all slowly getting lost in our dictionary. Everyone doing all they can to stay relevant even if it means morphing into carbon copies of already existing duplicates. Everyone trying to standout as a clone that they are forgetting that a photocopy will always remain just a mediocre of the original.

We’re all walking, talking faceless ‘ordinaries’ allowing ‘relevance’ to draw patterns unto us as they deem fit, still lacking distinction regardless.

To those who have managed to stay true, and self aware…

Part 2 contributed by Dyna Ekwueme

To those who don’t fall for mediocrity and cliché of existing contents and lifestyle. To those who don’t fit in the stereotypes displayed by the society and pressure exerted by peers and the  outside world that can’t see through their walls. This is not for you.

I want to speak my mind. I want to be free like that little child, be open to learning new things and absorbing the differences in us that shapes our inner minds. I want to be feared by my fears, put what matters first and not what appears to be important. I want to love not for the fashion or looks or the utterances made by jealous minds. I want to care less about the public, be humbled by little beginnings and fight for those who can’t find strength within them, yet I still crave to act otherwise because it’s what the public wants. That is the better way I believe the public can better appraise me. What a mess!

Do you write for your sake or that of the others?

Can you atone for the times you failed to recognize what could have been better? Is it ego or is it just us who are slowly dying from what the world has thrown at us? How much more are you willing to let out before you tell the real story behind how far you’ve come? where do you recognize as home? Here or there?

Disclaimer: This post was originally written and inspired by Emediong Etetim and part contributed by me. There was no third party to this collaboration.

Find out more about Emediong ( For lifestyle, fashion and real  life collaborations) on

Stylepith.com

IG- @em.etetim

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2016.

Blogging series 5: The spirit behind “I am”

by Marvel Augustine

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Picture gotten from- siouxlander

In life you go through a conditioning process, it creates a mindset (habitual) overflowing with ‘I AM NOTs’. I’ll throw in more light here, take for example; as a young girl of nubile age but you seem to have a broken relationship always, you find yourself with the wrong men and so on. You feel really bad and believe that you are not good enough, you look into the mirror and compare yourself to a glamorous movie idol or homecoming queen and say to yourself, I am not attractive.

Your relationship fractures, and you then begin to think you’re unloved or unworthy. Better still as a schoolchild with a less satisfactory scores (grades) on your report card, you say to yourself, “I am not smart”. These and many more are continuous occurrences you develop all through the years and into adulthood, which begins to define the way you see yourself.

Overcoming this “I am not” mindset  or mentality begins with trusting your inner spirit. There are no boundaries restricting your inner spirit, but your worldview and conceptions to the outer world are defined by this, using your five senses. The outer world is always changing, which, by our definition, means it is not real. This awareness that remains unchanging is the only reality that could lead you to experiencing a majestic wake-up
call.

Run through as many inventories as you can of the things that you would like to define your life with, then make the shift of your imaginations from “I AM NOT” to “I AM”. If you want what follows “I AM” to be harmonious, you should become conscious of what affects your inner spirit. Change the words that define the concept of yourself. Reword your inner mindset first, then seek to gain access to the real you and all that you  desire.

The words “I AM” which you consistently use should define who you truly are and what you are capable of. It should be represented as meek as that of the holy expression for the name of God. Always make your very first consideration the honor of your divine spirit. This will allow you rise to previously unimagined heights.Spiritual acknowledgement is a trigger to the power of “I AM”. Teach your outer self to acknowledge the Supernatural power of your inner spirit.

“I AM”, two of the most powerful words ever, whatever you put after them defines your reality. Stay positive!

Disclaimer: This piece was originally written by Marvel Augustine and this is one of the media he chose to share his inspirational piece. No parts were added by me or anyone. 

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2016.

Blogging series 4: Forest of Promise

by Aiidee Sinclair

I was on my way to Bonny Island to see a relative. We had boarded a ship and sailed off. After about 35 mins we heard fired gunshots. 

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Picture gotten from-Thailand

“what is the problem?” I asked one of the cabin crew.” our ship is under attack by a group of gangsters ” a man I could I tell from his voice was in great panic answered.

“what?!” I screamed on top of my voice with my heart throbbing aloud.

“Please Mr. help me! they are after me” said the most beautiful and gorgeous girl I have ever seen, crying by the end of the ship just close to the entrance of the main door.

I wasn’t in my right thinking as I forgot for a moment that we were in a great deal of danger. Her natural beauty got me. I finally decided to help, as what else was there to do when we were under attack by the unknown. As I pulled her up from the ground, she seemed frightened and had given me a distrustful look.

“What is happening? what offence did you commit? was it you who had caused this attack?” I asked furiously not minding if she had answers to it or not. It felt like such a nightmare. ” I was about to be smuggled into a world that doesn’t exist, I had escaped before my abductors knew what was next”  she replied with a hasty look. 

“boss! there she is” A man with a huge jaw beard appeared from behind her. She turned,  pointing at the three hefty men with large figures and a mean lookwalking towards us with the man I had seen at first, screaming 

“please Mr. help me! those men are after me”, I quickly grabbed her by her hand  and began running towards the front of the ship not knowing where this will eventually lead us.

“There is no other option than for us to jump as many of the crew had done” I said softly to her when we got to the front top of the ship. She didn’t hesitate but jumped off the ship. I followed swiftly. We swam for what seemed like an eternity until I passed out….

we found ourselves at the shore of the sea surrounded by thick green forests….

To be continued…

Disclaimer: This piece was originally written by Aiidee Sinclair and this is one of the media he chose to share his fictional prose. No parts were added by me or anyone. 

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2016.

 

Blogging series 3: The fortress of our romance

by Vic-Sandra

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                                        Picture gotten from-Rominblack

Words unspoken
Eyes unrelated
The quiet of the distance
The distance between the space
Her tongue rising only to fall
Her lips parting only to sigh
And her voice heard, only to falter
And only the heart in his voice could lift her gaze

And this is the fortress of our romance;
Backs aback,
Rears at rage,
Thumping thresholds,
Even the boundaries bicker
The carcasses of our empty pain linked umbilically
And the laughs of our yesterday stand appalled
Is this the fortress of our romance?

Tight eyes open only with hope of a promise
The promise to be held beyond our grief
And the faith in his safe hands,
Ones that nudged my entirety to life
And cradled my fears to sleep
For the edge we sought had found us
And only our instinctive breath had pulled us beyond our volatile volition
In hindsight, this really was our fortress
For only here did we fight, to love
And cry to smile
And part to be held.

Part 1: contributed by Dyna Ekwueme

In soft touch we rekindled,

doses of unfelt passion.

The place we had it all

bearing  it with trade marks of our untold kisses

The memoirs of our romance

The letters written in penance.

Oh darling! how strong can you feel this love

the plight of our soft edges.

Let me save you this beating heart

a thousand times and more

to feel this thing we bore,

Love, Ore.

Disclaimer:This piece was originally written by Vic-Sandra and part contributed by me. No parts were added by any other.

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2016.

 

Blogging Series 1: Politics in chaos, but hope must prevail (Great Britain)

by Laurence Howell.

Anyone even briefly analyzing the global political landscape over the last year or so could be easily forgiven for not being filled with too much optimism for our future, with many paying close attention to the recent discovery of a second Earth, eagerly waiting to see how much a single ticket will be.

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Picture gotten from-Britishprotest

Firstly, though I thought it would be interesting to analyse France’s recent banning of the Burkini and look at some of the flawed reasoning for it. The French government claim that the burqa and burkini are a security risk as they allow citizens to be concealed, but the same isn’t being said for motorcycle helmets or habits of other religions. To me this is a religious profiling of every Muslim, as a dangerous extremist that the public should be paranoid of being blown up by, perhaps the event that this paranoia stems from is the mass shootings in Paris on November 13th of 2015. Isis claimed responsibility for the attack, but the West’s response to this has been extremely reactionary and evidenced double standards. Whilst pretty much the entirety of the leaders of EU member states came together to mourn this terrible attack, which it was, no such unity was shown with the victims of the July 3rd 2016 Karrada bombing in Baghdad. This attack was also carried out by Isis. Since the Paris attacks the West have instigated a bombing strategy in Syria in response, this to me shows the callousness and hypocrisy of many Western political leaders, who empathize and mourn the dead but pursue policies in response that result in even more innocent death.

Someone who stands opposed to the actions of these Western leaders is one who gives hope to me and many others, Jeremy Corbyn. A conviction politician, who guides his policies on whats best for the people of the world rather than what will make him look like a strong a powerful leader and gain support in a largely corrupt media. Arrested for his anti-apartheid views in 1984, frequently criticized for his support of political negotiations in Ireland rather than continuing the violence and a staunch opponent of the Iraq war. Corbyn’s humanitarian principles are something which are seen as the antithesis to a lot of modern day leaders. The smear campaign that has been run by a number of Labour MP’s, predominantly run out of Alistair Campbell’s PR office, creates the image in my mind of “don’t promise that you’ll make us look bad”. But despite all that’s been thrown at him Corbyn by the media and those like Eagle and Benn, he still hasn’t resigned and is fighting strong against Owen Smith in the leadership election. In fact, one of the biggest victories is moving the party to the left as the opposition candidate has had to adopt many of the same policies as him in order to appeal to the growing membership who support socialist principles. One thing is clear, the membership are tired of spin and career politicians and so if they elect Owen Smith he must prove those such as myself who tar him with this brush and stick to the positions he has claimed during the leadership election, otherwise he will face mass scrutiny from them.

Disclaimer: This piece was originally written by Laurence Howell and this is one of the media he chose to air his personal opinion regarding British politics. No parts were added by me or anyone. 

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2016.

 

A chronicle of the girl, the art and nothing

It was the outrage that came from her timid being that bored them all. Her overwhelming stream of emotions and reach for the presence not present. It  had sparked the uneasiness of the rest who couldn’t stand what they called “the girl”. They thought of her conversations as one filled with illusive poems and a rare kind of joy for places and people they can’t relate to. “It must have been hell to endure or maybe she just told us another version of it all”, sane people thought this.

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Picture gotten from-Pinterest

The girl.

No one knew havoc like she. The turmoil she built in the others’ hearts when she spoke of their guilt and wrote to save those ridden on. At some point, I could tell she became immune to the voices that overstretched her will. She went on to lean on her own tears when her bed and those white fluffy pillows were too far from her exhaling temple. The fear she bore was all printed yet made discrete in her confidence and zeal. It was her weakness and her battleground but in all, she fought them.

The art. 

“I remember replacing the still life image with an abstract. I remember the first gaze of disbelieve. I remember putting it away countless times and bringing it back to the same spot, hoarding the meaningless like it were a pair of shoes”. That was the art. ” The meaning I found in no meaning, spellbound by each scene I displayed in my own confusion.” ” Should I dispose this or not?”, “all in my head with no form of frivolous escape. It earns a place as always in the warmest of hearts whenever I tell it, just like you just felt knowing this.”

Nothing.

It’s nothing. No one will ever know of this kind. The chronicle is void so does the person who just told it, but then who? My plea, feel nothing.

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2016.

Necessities of a less active blogger

As there are more people who blog part-time and during their leisure than those who blog as a full time job, there are essentials that can help you post whenever you’re ready, if you’re one of the former. Not necessarily blogging after 6 months or a year but frequently as it keeps you engaged with your beautiful thoughts and your audience whilst away from your website.

Picture gotten from-Teaandblog

Here are three key necessities I’ve picked out and collectively, I use them to stay active outside my blog.

  • Writing material/ Implement– This is anything ranging from a pen and paper , to sketch pads, phones/gadgets or even jotters that you can conveniently carry around with you, just in case inspiration strikes anywhere. I conveniently use Notes on my phone to write down and describe briefly what it is that comes to my head. This can also come in handy when writing a totally different piece as you can refer to your material/ implement.
  • Camera– As the world keeps developing, more people are becoming visual learners as they can read more meaning and put words together just by looking at pictures. You may not consider this a necessity but you should know that images go a long way to help you remember scenarios. It captures the moment, telling you “what” and “where” and sometimes even  “when”. This can then help you recollect memories and add new ideas to what you intend on posting. Cameras can come in form of mobile phones (which of course should have an in-built camera) or an actual camera which you can get online or in stores at affordable prices.
  • Reminder-Let’s all call this the “motivational piece”. Procrastination is one sting that we all have and refuse to get an antidote for, so, having a reminder can push us to post our short-saved thoughts and ideas. You can either set an alarm/(s), tick a date on your calendar, tell a friend to remind you, jot it down somewhere or save your notes on your drafts to help tell you when to publish. There is no universal reminder I can recommend than to do/use what works best for you.

I believe these essentials are necessary for someone who blogs less but thinks more. If there are anymore that you can think of,  I’d like you to air your opinion in the comment box below. Thank you.

Dyna Ekwueme Copyright, 2016.